He isn't frustrated with you... He just wants to spend time with you...
Do you ever wonder if you're disappointing the Lord? That maybe you've let Him down? Maybe you haven't quite held up your end of the relationship as well as He is holding up His. There are certain aspects in life where I just feel like I keep falling short, and I find myself wondering if I'm frustrating Him.
I made this commitment that I was going to read through the entire Bible last year. The real truth is that I've made that commitment many times. And although I'm sure that during the span of my lifetime I've read though it, I wanted to be intentional to read it from cover to cover. To soak it up. To study it and dwell on it. But last year came and went, and I wasn't finished. This year is already speeding by, and I'm almost through Psalms. That's right, about half way, and I didn't fulfill my commitment. Again.
Sometimes I don't feel worthy. Worthy that the Lord would give me an ounce of His time. That He would not only call to me, but that He would listen to me when I call on His name. That He would answer my requests, that He would bend His ear towards me. I don't feel worthy to crack open my bible and be given the opportunity to be overwhelmed by His word because I could be doing so much better. I could be a better commitment keeper than I've been. And I feel like I am failing. Like I don't deserve chance after chance or the opportunity to keep renewing my commitment. That maybe I'm running out of chances and He's going to quit taking me seriously. That He's probably thinking to himself, "Haven't you said you're going to do this a hundred times? Are you actually going to do it or not? Just decide and stick with it if you are."
But I remember reading that He is patient. Long suffering. And I see it in the stories that I read. How He is slow to anger. How He is gentle and compassionate. How He constantly leads His people back to Himself regardless how far, or how often, they strayed away. He pursued them even when they didn't deserve it. He loved them with an everlasting love even when they didn't return it. He offered unlimited forgiveness for their selfish acts, their forgetfulness, their blatant disregard of His ways, for the many times they chased their fleshly desires, and if that wasn't enough, He sent His son. To die in their place, in our place. To be the perfect sacrifice. To tear the veil so that you, so that I, could approach the throne with confidence to receive mercy and grace when I need it... which is every time.
And so I flipped open to Psalms last night, to the chapter marked with a bookmark that says, "Jesus Loves Me." I began reading, and He spoke. I read words of comfort, words of encouragement. Pages dripping with God's love for His children. Pages filled with wonder and majesty, words of old. Words that will never fade. And I am reminded, again, of how much I need God's grace and how generous He is to freely bestow it upon me.
Child, He isn't frustrated with you. He simply wants to spend time with you. He is calling, He is beckoning... go to Him.
"How kind the Lord is! How good he is! So merciful, this God of ours." - Psalm 116:5
I made this commitment that I was going to read through the entire Bible last year. The real truth is that I've made that commitment many times. And although I'm sure that during the span of my lifetime I've read though it, I wanted to be intentional to read it from cover to cover. To soak it up. To study it and dwell on it. But last year came and went, and I wasn't finished. This year is already speeding by, and I'm almost through Psalms. That's right, about half way, and I didn't fulfill my commitment. Again.
Sometimes I don't feel worthy. Worthy that the Lord would give me an ounce of His time. That He would not only call to me, but that He would listen to me when I call on His name. That He would answer my requests, that He would bend His ear towards me. I don't feel worthy to crack open my bible and be given the opportunity to be overwhelmed by His word because I could be doing so much better. I could be a better commitment keeper than I've been. And I feel like I am failing. Like I don't deserve chance after chance or the opportunity to keep renewing my commitment. That maybe I'm running out of chances and He's going to quit taking me seriously. That He's probably thinking to himself, "Haven't you said you're going to do this a hundred times? Are you actually going to do it or not? Just decide and stick with it if you are."
But I remember reading that He is patient. Long suffering. And I see it in the stories that I read. How He is slow to anger. How He is gentle and compassionate. How He constantly leads His people back to Himself regardless how far, or how often, they strayed away. He pursued them even when they didn't deserve it. He loved them with an everlasting love even when they didn't return it. He offered unlimited forgiveness for their selfish acts, their forgetfulness, their blatant disregard of His ways, for the many times they chased their fleshly desires, and if that wasn't enough, He sent His son. To die in their place, in our place. To be the perfect sacrifice. To tear the veil so that you, so that I, could approach the throne with confidence to receive mercy and grace when I need it... which is every time.
And so I flipped open to Psalms last night, to the chapter marked with a bookmark that says, "Jesus Loves Me." I began reading, and He spoke. I read words of comfort, words of encouragement. Pages dripping with God's love for His children. Pages filled with wonder and majesty, words of old. Words that will never fade. And I am reminded, again, of how much I need God's grace and how generous He is to freely bestow it upon me.
Child, He isn't frustrated with you. He simply wants to spend time with you. He is calling, He is beckoning... go to Him.
"How kind the Lord is! How good he is! So merciful, this God of ours." - Psalm 116:5
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