a change in perspective...
Almost 10 years ago, I learned one of the most important lessons of my life. In a time of personal exile. Loss. Darkness. Sorrow and sadness.
I learned how to be grateful.
I got to a point of such great despondency that I was tired of being sad. I was tired of crying, of feeling worried and afraid. I just wanted my life to go back to "normal." The problem with that was there was no way to return to normal. I was learning how to live and embrace what was now my new normal and it was extremely difficult. I was emerging from living through my worst nightmares. The one thing I was certain would never be my reality not only happened but was now a done deal. I had lived through it, and life on the other side felt foreign. And so the Lord challenged me. It was almost a Job-type scenario. If you've read the book of Job then you know that the majority of the book is full of lamenting and questioning. God listens for a long time and then finally, towards the end of the book, God speaks up, and Job 38 says:
"Who is this that obscures my plans with word without knowledge?
Brace yourself like a man. I will question you, and you shall answer me."
I vividly remember the night that God basically called me to account and said, "You're tired of letting your emotions run roughshod over you? You're tired of being a slave to feelings of worry and fear? If that's the case, then it's time to do something about it."
God is so gracious and patient and kind. And he can handle our tough questions, but what I came to realize is that all I was bringing to God was tough questions. I was complaining and whining and allowing my circumstances to steer my prayers, my thoughts, and my feelings. Praise and gratitude were rarely the first things on my lips, and God knew those two things would be my remedy.
Every day, I looked for a reason to be grateful. A reason I could thank God. Maybe it was for a delicious cup of warm coffee. Maybe it was for a person in my life. Often times it was for the beauty of creation or a song that spoke hope directly to my heart. The more I practiced the art of gratitude and thanksgiving, the more I realized I had a whole lot to be thankful for. And the more thankful I was, the more my perspective shifted and my pit of despair grew smaller and smaller by the day.
It's hard to be thankful in the middle of a pandemic. It's hard to be grateful when "normal life" was snatched away, almost overnight, and the new norm is less than desirable. It's hard to find gratitude when you see a rising death toll and a falling economy. The two things we value the most, our health and finances, have been shaken to the core and we feel extremely vulnerable. But I was reminded of a story in Luke 24 about the day Jesus rose from the tomb and met two men on the way to Emmaus.
These men were despondent about the recent events that had happened in Jerusalem. Jesus had been crucified three days ago, and when Jesus asked what they were discussing, they said...
"Are you the only one in Jerusalem that hasn't heard what's happened during the last few days... the things that happened to Jesus the Nazarene... we had our hopes up that he was the one, the one about to deliver Israel..."
An odd question to ask Jesus, right? He knew what had happened. It was his own story! But in the midst of their circumstances, they didn't recognize him. They saw the world through a lens of sorrow, grief, and despair. They kept on walking with him, listening to him, visiting with him, and even asked him to join them for dinner, and here's where the story gets interesting.
"When he sat at the table with them, he took break, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him..."
A change of perspective. All of the sudden, they could see him right in their midst. What joy, what a relief! And I believe that it's when we practice thanksgiving, we can see him in our presence, too.
So what am I thankful for in the middle of this season?
I am thankful for technology that allows me to do church from home on Sunday mornings.
I am thankful for the season of spring, warm days, and extra sunlight so we can enjoy time outside.
I am thankful for God's unexpected provision in the midst of uncertainty.
I am thankful for the little church park that my girls and I have walked to on a regular basis to play and have fun.
I am thankful for how God is growing and challenging me during this time despite feeling stretched to the max many days.
I am thankful for my home and the shelter it provides even when the walls feel a bit like they're closing in.
I am thankful that although life has currently changed, God has not.
Ann Voskamp writes, "Thanksgiving precedes the miracle." And one incredible miracle is that in the midst of difficult seasons, God's children still have much to be thankful for.
So for what are you thankful?
I learned how to be grateful.
I got to a point of such great despondency that I was tired of being sad. I was tired of crying, of feeling worried and afraid. I just wanted my life to go back to "normal." The problem with that was there was no way to return to normal. I was learning how to live and embrace what was now my new normal and it was extremely difficult. I was emerging from living through my worst nightmares. The one thing I was certain would never be my reality not only happened but was now a done deal. I had lived through it, and life on the other side felt foreign. And so the Lord challenged me. It was almost a Job-type scenario. If you've read the book of Job then you know that the majority of the book is full of lamenting and questioning. God listens for a long time and then finally, towards the end of the book, God speaks up, and Job 38 says:
"Who is this that obscures my plans with word without knowledge?
Brace yourself like a man. I will question you, and you shall answer me."
I vividly remember the night that God basically called me to account and said, "You're tired of letting your emotions run roughshod over you? You're tired of being a slave to feelings of worry and fear? If that's the case, then it's time to do something about it."
God is so gracious and patient and kind. And he can handle our tough questions, but what I came to realize is that all I was bringing to God was tough questions. I was complaining and whining and allowing my circumstances to steer my prayers, my thoughts, and my feelings. Praise and gratitude were rarely the first things on my lips, and God knew those two things would be my remedy.
Every day, I looked for a reason to be grateful. A reason I could thank God. Maybe it was for a delicious cup of warm coffee. Maybe it was for a person in my life. Often times it was for the beauty of creation or a song that spoke hope directly to my heart. The more I practiced the art of gratitude and thanksgiving, the more I realized I had a whole lot to be thankful for. And the more thankful I was, the more my perspective shifted and my pit of despair grew smaller and smaller by the day.
It's hard to be thankful in the middle of a pandemic. It's hard to be grateful when "normal life" was snatched away, almost overnight, and the new norm is less than desirable. It's hard to find gratitude when you see a rising death toll and a falling economy. The two things we value the most, our health and finances, have been shaken to the core and we feel extremely vulnerable. But I was reminded of a story in Luke 24 about the day Jesus rose from the tomb and met two men on the way to Emmaus.
These men were despondent about the recent events that had happened in Jerusalem. Jesus had been crucified three days ago, and when Jesus asked what they were discussing, they said...
"Are you the only one in Jerusalem that hasn't heard what's happened during the last few days... the things that happened to Jesus the Nazarene... we had our hopes up that he was the one, the one about to deliver Israel..."
An odd question to ask Jesus, right? He knew what had happened. It was his own story! But in the midst of their circumstances, they didn't recognize him. They saw the world through a lens of sorrow, grief, and despair. They kept on walking with him, listening to him, visiting with him, and even asked him to join them for dinner, and here's where the story gets interesting.
"When he sat at the table with them, he took break, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him..."
A change of perspective. All of the sudden, they could see him right in their midst. What joy, what a relief! And I believe that it's when we practice thanksgiving, we can see him in our presence, too.
So what am I thankful for in the middle of this season?
I am thankful for technology that allows me to do church from home on Sunday mornings.
I am thankful for the season of spring, warm days, and extra sunlight so we can enjoy time outside.
I am thankful for God's unexpected provision in the midst of uncertainty.
I am thankful for the little church park that my girls and I have walked to on a regular basis to play and have fun.
I am thankful for how God is growing and challenging me during this time despite feeling stretched to the max many days.
I am thankful for my home and the shelter it provides even when the walls feel a bit like they're closing in.
I am thankful that although life has currently changed, God has not.
Ann Voskamp writes, "Thanksgiving precedes the miracle." And one incredible miracle is that in the midst of difficult seasons, God's children still have much to be thankful for.
So for what are you thankful?
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