Stories are like pancakes... each one has two sides...

It’s a tragic event. A lose/lose situation that no one could make better at this point. And we all have our opinions. We’ve all chosen a side even though we might not admit it. We’ve tried to label one right and one wrong. Because that’s how our minds work. That’s how we can make sense of difficult situations. That’s how we reason, rationalize, and try to understand it. Because no matter who you are, you identify with one side of the story. And sure, we could point fingers back and forth for the rest our days on earth, but what’s that going to help?

 

Stories are like pancakes. Each one has two sides and they’re not far apart. Of course, many of us devour that pancake only getting a glimpse at one side of the story. We don’t flip it over and inspect the other side. We figure it looks the same as the side we can see. But things can happen when pancakes cook on a hot griddle, and I can guarantee you that both sides aren’t the same.

 

I have my side of the story. My part of the pancake. It looks different from the other side of the pancake. In fact, if you only listened to one side, you’d probably be convinced to stick with that side. You’d probably be convinced to not even listen to the other side. You’d determine whether you thought it was right or wrong, and you’d hold fast to your decision. And even if you had the chance to open your mind, to lay aside your biases, and listen to both sides, you’d probably still stick with the side you most identified with. You’d tell everyone else, “This is right side of the pancake.” And if they agreed with you, you’d join forces. If they didn’t agree with you, you’d take up your defenses.

 

But the fact is, you have two sides that aren’t getting separated. They’ve been joined. It’s a pancake. You can’t undo a pancake once it exists. But you can determine what you’ll do going forward. You can’t control the other side. No matter how much you try, it’s impossible. The other side might choose to handle things in a different way. That’s okay. They’ll be the ones to answer for their actions just like you’ll answer for yours. People are into pancake watching, you know, and they’ll see in the end how you both handle it. Even if they don’t know your side, they’ll know your reaction. They’ll know if you choose to walk forward with grace, integrity, and dignity, or they’ll know if you choose to walk forward with hatred, bitterness, and anger. And I can tell you from personal experience, the former is better than the latter. If you want to be an agent of change, if you want to make a lasting and productive difference with your side of the story, if you want different circumstances than the ones you’re currently in, you’ve got to hold your head high and move forward. It might be hard. It might seem unfair. It might hurt. But that’s what you have to do. You can’t change your past, but you can change the future.

 

I remember hearing a story of a woman whose husband was shot in cold blood. He was out delivering newspapers one morning to make a little extra money for his family. He was killed by a couple of men simply for gang related purposes. He wasn’t associated with the gang, he just happened to be out and about in the early, dark hours of the morning. The police were finally able to track down the men who shot him. They called his widow, who was also a young mother, to the stand during the trial. She looked at the men and offered them forgiveness because Jesus had forgiven her. She told the men that she hoped they came to know Jesus as their Savior as a result of this event. She said, “If it meant that my husband had to die for you to know Jesus and be saved, I know he’d give up his life again for that.”

 

There were two sides to the story. In the end, it didn’t matter which one seemed right and which one seemed wrong. What done was done, but the future didn’t have to look like the past. Hopefully, for all parties involved, it didn’t.

 

"Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord." - Romans 12:19