your circumstances aren't who you are, they're what happened to you...
I've been itching to blog all week, but I haven't had the time. This week has required a lot of my time, and sleep has been of upmost important. No late blogging nights, except for tonight. Tomorrow is Friday, so I can make up for lost sleep this weekend.
As tired as my brain has been each day, it's packed full of things I need to get off my chest. I want to write about choices, about service, about how the way we treat others is often a reflection of how we feel about God. And so I'll get to those things, don't you worry. But the truth is, there's much that I want to say. Tonight, I'll just pick one.
I think the hard thing about being an adult is that if you're not in a tough spot, you know someone who is. I bet we could easily name off 10 people who are going through a difficult season on any given day. And the thing about these seasons is that they're often life changing. These aren't school ground bullies or bad cafeteria lunches. These seasons require things of you that you never imagined yourself experiencing. These seasons are packed full of things you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy. Things so painful that they have a way of changing your perspective on life, your perspective on yourself. And, if given the opportunity, these things will whisper lies into your ears as much as they possibly can until you begin to believe them and forget the truth.
I remember thinking that I was worthless the day those papers showed up in the mail. It was like whatever value I did have was completely erased and there was no way I would ever be able to return to my original value. Kind of like a car, you know. Instant depreciation. And I carried that around with me as if it was my name. This shameful, unwanted badge that had been thrust on me. I'd introduce myself to people as "Brittnye." That was it, just Brittnye. Because I didn't know who I was, really. I knew what I was. I was divorced, and I thought that's all people saw. Even the people that didn't know me somehow knew what I was, I just knew they did. And if someone would have said, "Brittnye, give us 5 words that describe you," it would have been something like this. Unwanted, unloved, unworthy, ashamed, and a failure. And I began to allow those things to slowly define who I was until I fully believed that I was every bad thing any one person could possibly imagine themselves to be.
But I began telling my story. It would take every ounce of courage I had to share it, and people would argue my points with me. They would never agree with all of the bad thoughts I had about myself. They would say things that were the complete opposite, and no one affirmed what I believed was the truth. And the more I shared, the more it became clear. And as people began to share with me, I understood what they saw. Because I would hear their stories and I would think, "You're all wrong! You're so more than that negative thing that happened to you! You're beautiful, important, significant, and worthy! You're so much more than what happened to you. It was just a bad decision, a bad choice, a bad situation, an unfortunate circumstance. It's not you who you are. You're not "that," you're you! You're remarkable! If only you could see yourself the way I do."
Circumstances happen, but they don't define who they are. I'm not divorced. I went through a divorce. And even though it changed my life in a way I never imagined, it's exactly that. A life event. A situation that was written in my books, but it's not who I am. Not even close to who I am. And thing in your life, you know what I am talking about, it's not who you are, either. Because you are you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are treasured. You are dearly loved by a great God. You are forgiven and redeemed. You're accepted, you're significant, and you matter. And when you believe that, when you truly take God at His word, you'll begin to see it. He'll use it, no doubt. And each time He does, you'll praise Him for the fact that it's not who you are because you are His!
"And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love." - Romans 8:38
As tired as my brain has been each day, it's packed full of things I need to get off my chest. I want to write about choices, about service, about how the way we treat others is often a reflection of how we feel about God. And so I'll get to those things, don't you worry. But the truth is, there's much that I want to say. Tonight, I'll just pick one.
I think the hard thing about being an adult is that if you're not in a tough spot, you know someone who is. I bet we could easily name off 10 people who are going through a difficult season on any given day. And the thing about these seasons is that they're often life changing. These aren't school ground bullies or bad cafeteria lunches. These seasons require things of you that you never imagined yourself experiencing. These seasons are packed full of things you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy. Things so painful that they have a way of changing your perspective on life, your perspective on yourself. And, if given the opportunity, these things will whisper lies into your ears as much as they possibly can until you begin to believe them and forget the truth.
I remember thinking that I was worthless the day those papers showed up in the mail. It was like whatever value I did have was completely erased and there was no way I would ever be able to return to my original value. Kind of like a car, you know. Instant depreciation. And I carried that around with me as if it was my name. This shameful, unwanted badge that had been thrust on me. I'd introduce myself to people as "Brittnye." That was it, just Brittnye. Because I didn't know who I was, really. I knew what I was. I was divorced, and I thought that's all people saw. Even the people that didn't know me somehow knew what I was, I just knew they did. And if someone would have said, "Brittnye, give us 5 words that describe you," it would have been something like this. Unwanted, unloved, unworthy, ashamed, and a failure. And I began to allow those things to slowly define who I was until I fully believed that I was every bad thing any one person could possibly imagine themselves to be.
But I began telling my story. It would take every ounce of courage I had to share it, and people would argue my points with me. They would never agree with all of the bad thoughts I had about myself. They would say things that were the complete opposite, and no one affirmed what I believed was the truth. And the more I shared, the more it became clear. And as people began to share with me, I understood what they saw. Because I would hear their stories and I would think, "You're all wrong! You're so more than that negative thing that happened to you! You're beautiful, important, significant, and worthy! You're so much more than what happened to you. It was just a bad decision, a bad choice, a bad situation, an unfortunate circumstance. It's not you who you are. You're not "that," you're you! You're remarkable! If only you could see yourself the way I do."
Circumstances happen, but they don't define who they are. I'm not divorced. I went through a divorce. And even though it changed my life in a way I never imagined, it's exactly that. A life event. A situation that was written in my books, but it's not who I am. Not even close to who I am. And thing in your life, you know what I am talking about, it's not who you are, either. Because you are you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are treasured. You are dearly loved by a great God. You are forgiven and redeemed. You're accepted, you're significant, and you matter. And when you believe that, when you truly take God at His word, you'll begin to see it. He'll use it, no doubt. And each time He does, you'll praise Him for the fact that it's not who you are because you are His!
"And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love." - Romans 8:38
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