because you are who you are...

You're 6 months old today, Annabeth! Half a year! I can't believe it, but then again, I can. I always look forward to each month while trying to be sure that I'm not rushing our days. Because let me just say, I am loving my time with you. You went to your first baby shower this morning, and the grandmother of the baby we were celebrating told me that she has yet to keep her other grandbaby over night. Her daughter said, "Mom, I waited a long time for this baby, and I am not ready to part with her yet." And I totally get that. I feel the same way. I waited almost 30 years to have you, and right now, I just can't get enough!

This past month has been a big one for you! You've now had a full month of sleeping in your own room, and you've handled it like a big girl. You found your feet, which seems to keep you pretty entertained. You've been chewing on any and every thing you can get your hands on. I don't see any teeth in your mouth, but I won't be surprised if they show up before long. Your little personality is growing by leaps and bounds. Right now, I have a feeling that you may not only have your dad's looks, but you also have his personality. Luckily, he's good looking and has a winning personality. You've started smiling at people you don't know, which is sweet - especially for them. You took your first road trip to attend your first wedding and traveled like a pro. You're becoming more and more observant by the day. And for the first time last week, you reached your little hand out to try and pet Scout. I thought it was cute. Scout was terrified. We'll work on it. 

I was a little nervous when you turned four months old because I had been hearing about this thing called a sleep regression. I still have no idea what it is, but it sounded like I'd be getting less sleep. I was dreading this regression business because you were sleeping so well, and so was I. Since becoming your mother, and I mean from the day I knew you existed, I have kept myself in the dark. Ignorance has been bliss, and I have chosen to do things the old school way. I haven't researched information, and I haven't read any baby development books. I'm just feeling my way through this whole process, But I had heard some other mothers discussing the regression cycle, and I thought, "Oh great! I thought baby sleeping patterns were only supposed to get better with age, not worse!" And so month four came. Month four went. Our sleep stayed steady. We just laid you in your bed every night when you were ready to sleep, and you'd wake up in the morning. Nothing changed, and God continues to remind me that you are you.

I want you to remember that, Annabeth. Because sometimes it's easy to compare ourselves to others. Sometimes it's easy to look at their lives and try to match ours up. But just because something is the case for someone, good or bad, doesn't mean it's the case for you. One day, you'll grow up and your friends will get married and if you don't happen to do that at the same time, you may be tempted to think, "Goodness! Has my time come and gone? This seems to be happening for everyone else. Is there something wrong with me?" Or maybe all of your friends start having babies when you don't and so you might wonder the same thing. You may think this very though throughout many seasons in your life, and so I just want to tell you that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Not a thing. It is okay if you're not like everyone else. It's okay if you do things on your own timeline, as God has designed. It's perfectly fine to march to the beat of your own drum. And if you ask me, it's better to just keep your eyes on the Lord, staying focused on His will for your life, because it will look different than the one He has for someone else. We don't all have to operate on the same timetable. 

All of your days, and nights, were written before you were born. As your mom, I am going to do my best to help you live out those days as God has planned. I don't know what lies ahead, only He does. But we'll figure it out one day at time. That's seemed to work thus far, and if we just so happen to feel unsure of the next step, we'll ask God and we'll thank Him for showing us. For giving us His word, which is a lamp for our feet and light on our path. (Psalm 119:105)