to the mom who...
I pulled out the Baby Bullet tonight to do a little reading now that my girl is ready to eat fruits and veggies. As a new parent, you register for items you think you need, items you've heard you need, and then items that you hope you'll get. The Baby Bullet was one of those "hope we'll get" items on our list. If we didn't get it, we were hoping we'd have enough gift cards to buy one. Thankfully, a friend gifted us with this baby food making machine, and the time has come to finally use it.
As I read through the manual and cookbook, I thought back to the many months ago when we registered for this item. I was determined to try to make Annabeth's first year of life as inexpensive as possible since I was going to stop working. Breastfeeding is free, and spending a couple of dollars on fresh produce to make a week's worth of meals sounded like the most cost efficient method I could come up with. Little did I know, we'd be paying almost $100 a month for formula since breastfeeding didn't work out as planned. Four months ago when I finally came to terms with the fact that it just wasn't going to cut it for us, I felt all sorts of guilt. Not just "mom guilt," but financial guilt, too. I decided that since I couldn't control that process, I'd take control of what I could and absolutely make Annabeth's food to try and recoup some of the formula cost. I sat in the floor thinking about what foods I would puree this weekend, and I wondered why I even gave any grief towards our issues with nursing. That time seems so far removed now that we have settled into a lovely, and slightly predictable, routine. If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have batted an eye at the issue. On the grand scale of life, it seems so small.
A girlfriend and I were talking about babies and their eating habits a few weeks ago and she said, "I nursed my son until he was well over a year old, so I'm like, "You can eat Gerber baby food! I did my part." And you know what I thought? Nothing. I didn't think a thing about her comment one way or another. I'm just glad that she feeds her baby. Because her little one and mine, both being fed in different manners, will eventually both end up scarfing down chicken nuggets and french fries at Chick-fil-A like every other toddler who has teeth and a chicken loving mom. And no matter how children are fed, they grow up to be adults who eat what they want, when they want, how they want. And so moms, keep this in mind.
Who. Cares.
No one cares how you feed your baby. I know it totally feels like they do because the internet and social media are full of opinions, but you just need to give your child food. If you want to breastfeed until all of their teeth come in and they're speaking in full sentences, then have at it. If you decide to use formula from the start, then find some good coupons because you'll need them. If you puree your baby's food, high five. If you buy it from the store, gold star. No one cares how you feed your child. In fact, I bet your kid is not going to be mad about your method of choice because they don't know. They just know they're hungry and they want food. The way you feed your baby does not determine whether or not you're a good mother. Caring for your child and meeting their needs is the mark of a great mom.
And no one cares how you had your baby. You had a baby. That's a big dang deal! Whether you had a home birth, a drug-free birth, a water birth, an epidural, a c-section. It doesn't matter what method you chose because you know what, each one ends with the same result. A baby! That's right. And on top of that, you carried that baby around for 9 (or so) months, so good job there, too! My mom had a c-section with me due to my choice of position and refusal to turn, and I don't hold it against her. I could care the less. I'm just thankful she brought me into this world safe and sound. I'm certain my daughter will feel the same way. Having a child in one manner or another doesn't make you more or less of a woman. Having two X chromosomes makes you a woman.
How many children do you have? How close or far apart are they? Do they go to daycare? Do you have a nanny? Do you stay home? Do you have a your baby on a schedule? Is your child sleeping through the night? Have they rolled over? Are they walking? How many words can they say? And you know this isn't even the tip of the iceberg when it comes to questions. Of course, the questions never stop. I don't know of many men who go around asking other men these questions, so I'm not sure why women do it and then make themselves feel better or worse for the answers. When I was a little girl, I would ask my dad all sorts of questions and sometimes he would say, "Nunya." I'd ask, "What's nunya?" to which he'd reply, "Nunya business." And don't you just want to say that sometimes? But we know that questions will be asked, opinions will be expressed, judgement will be cast, and so here's what I say, "Who cares?!"
You're the mom of your child. The mom your child needs. And it doesn't matter if you birthed them or not. God has given them to YOU to take care of. If he wanted your friend to be your child's mom, she would be. But he didn't. He entrusted that baby to you, and the less you care about what others might be thinking, the better off you'll be. Because, as you'll come to learn, people don't think about us as often as we assume they do. They're too busy thinking about themselves. We all are. And next to the Lord, himself, no one cares more about your child, or knows that child better, than you. So you just do what you need to do, and you let your friends do what they need to do. Because the goal is to keep your baby alive, healthy, and thriving. And if you're doing that, then no matter how you're doing it, you're doing something right.
As I read through the manual and cookbook, I thought back to the many months ago when we registered for this item. I was determined to try to make Annabeth's first year of life as inexpensive as possible since I was going to stop working. Breastfeeding is free, and spending a couple of dollars on fresh produce to make a week's worth of meals sounded like the most cost efficient method I could come up with. Little did I know, we'd be paying almost $100 a month for formula since breastfeeding didn't work out as planned. Four months ago when I finally came to terms with the fact that it just wasn't going to cut it for us, I felt all sorts of guilt. Not just "mom guilt," but financial guilt, too. I decided that since I couldn't control that process, I'd take control of what I could and absolutely make Annabeth's food to try and recoup some of the formula cost. I sat in the floor thinking about what foods I would puree this weekend, and I wondered why I even gave any grief towards our issues with nursing. That time seems so far removed now that we have settled into a lovely, and slightly predictable, routine. If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have batted an eye at the issue. On the grand scale of life, it seems so small.
A girlfriend and I were talking about babies and their eating habits a few weeks ago and she said, "I nursed my son until he was well over a year old, so I'm like, "You can eat Gerber baby food! I did my part." And you know what I thought? Nothing. I didn't think a thing about her comment one way or another. I'm just glad that she feeds her baby. Because her little one and mine, both being fed in different manners, will eventually both end up scarfing down chicken nuggets and french fries at Chick-fil-A like every other toddler who has teeth and a chicken loving mom. And no matter how children are fed, they grow up to be adults who eat what they want, when they want, how they want. And so moms, keep this in mind.
Who. Cares.
No one cares how you feed your baby. I know it totally feels like they do because the internet and social media are full of opinions, but you just need to give your child food. If you want to breastfeed until all of their teeth come in and they're speaking in full sentences, then have at it. If you decide to use formula from the start, then find some good coupons because you'll need them. If you puree your baby's food, high five. If you buy it from the store, gold star. No one cares how you feed your child. In fact, I bet your kid is not going to be mad about your method of choice because they don't know. They just know they're hungry and they want food. The way you feed your baby does not determine whether or not you're a good mother. Caring for your child and meeting their needs is the mark of a great mom.
And no one cares how you had your baby. You had a baby. That's a big dang deal! Whether you had a home birth, a drug-free birth, a water birth, an epidural, a c-section. It doesn't matter what method you chose because you know what, each one ends with the same result. A baby! That's right. And on top of that, you carried that baby around for 9 (or so) months, so good job there, too! My mom had a c-section with me due to my choice of position and refusal to turn, and I don't hold it against her. I could care the less. I'm just thankful she brought me into this world safe and sound. I'm certain my daughter will feel the same way. Having a child in one manner or another doesn't make you more or less of a woman. Having two X chromosomes makes you a woman.
How many children do you have? How close or far apart are they? Do they go to daycare? Do you have a nanny? Do you stay home? Do you have a your baby on a schedule? Is your child sleeping through the night? Have they rolled over? Are they walking? How many words can they say? And you know this isn't even the tip of the iceberg when it comes to questions. Of course, the questions never stop. I don't know of many men who go around asking other men these questions, so I'm not sure why women do it and then make themselves feel better or worse for the answers. When I was a little girl, I would ask my dad all sorts of questions and sometimes he would say, "Nunya." I'd ask, "What's nunya?" to which he'd reply, "Nunya business." And don't you just want to say that sometimes? But we know that questions will be asked, opinions will be expressed, judgement will be cast, and so here's what I say, "Who cares?!"
You're the mom of your child. The mom your child needs. And it doesn't matter if you birthed them or not. God has given them to YOU to take care of. If he wanted your friend to be your child's mom, she would be. But he didn't. He entrusted that baby to you, and the less you care about what others might be thinking, the better off you'll be. Because, as you'll come to learn, people don't think about us as often as we assume they do. They're too busy thinking about themselves. We all are. And next to the Lord, himself, no one cares more about your child, or knows that child better, than you. So you just do what you need to do, and you let your friends do what they need to do. Because the goal is to keep your baby alive, healthy, and thriving. And if you're doing that, then no matter how you're doing it, you're doing something right.
Comments
Post a Comment