when one just can't do it...
I've openly admitted that I've been failing in the blogosphere lately. I'm sure you can tell, too. My writing amount has greatly decreased. My amount of all things productive have also greatly increased. In fact, tonight was the first time I have cleaned my house in probably a month. Gross. I know. And, because I like to be honest, I didn't even clean the whole thing. I cleaned most of it, but it made a big difference. Laundry has hardly been done, and I really can't even tell you how many times I've cooked dinner in a month. The only thing I've really been able to accomplish each day is work. That's it. I have to garner up all of my energy and motivation to stick it out for 8 hours of work, and about 3:00 I begin longing to lay down and close my eyes. I come home for lunch every day to give Scout her 30 minutes of yard time, and I always ask her if she'll trade places with me for the afternoons. She has yet to agree.
We celebrated one of my co-workers today who will be getting married on Saturday. There's nothing that will conjures up more memories of your own day than celebrating a bride to be. Aaron and I will celebrate our 3 year anniversary next month (Can you believe that?), and I reminisced a bit about our wedding day. Truth be told, I wish I could go back every single year and live that day out. It was perfect. One of the best days of my life, hands down, and I've had a lot of really great days! I still remember every moment of the day so well, and I remember how excited I was to hear Aaron's vows. We wrote our own vows, but we didn't share them before our wedding day. I am all about surprises, so I wanted there to be an element of surprise as we listened to one another state our forever promises. Ironically enough, we'd written very similar vows. Not word for word, but you might have thought that we shared an outline. We didn't though. We just wrote what God placed on our hearts, and you know what, I look back on that day with such joy and gratitude because I knew that very day that next to following Jesus, I was making the best decision of my life.
You guys know our marriage isn't perfect. We don't think it is, and we don't pretend it is, either. We're just normal, ordinary, ornery people who really desire forever. But the longer I've known Aaron, and the more we've experienced together, the greater my appreciation for him grows. Because when you get married, you kind of know what to expect, but you've got a lot of figuring out to do. What I knew then, I loved, and so I felt confident that the things I'd learn I would come to love, too. But I also was guilty of thinking that my actions not only proved my love but made me lovable. I'm no domestic goddess, and I'll probably never be. I manage, but there's always someone who can do it better, right? Yet I would find myself thinking that if I could cook him dinner, keep his laundry basket from overflowing, keep the pantry stocked, and the house from looking like train wreck, then I was winning as wife. And so these past few weeks have been full of little self imposed guilt trips as I've watched the dust begin to layer on the furniture while laying in bed sleeping off my take out dinner before calling it a night.
Yet each night, Aaron takes our dishes to the sink and begins cleaning the kitchen. He has gone to pick up dinner if I've asked, or he's come home from a tiring day to cook dinner as I stand on the other side of the kitchen reading instructions because I can't stomach the look of raw meat. He has picked up the house as I've slept. He's brought me breakfast burritos to eat in bed after running his errands on Saturday mornings. He has rubbed my back, my feet, and spent many uneventful nights laying next to me in bed as I doze off and on between Netflix reruns. He has stepped up where I have stepped down, and he's never one said a word about my lazy ways as I have apologized over and over again for not doing my part. He has carried the weight that I've been too tired to hold up, and he's been ever so patient and kind as we're both entering into unchartered territory knowing full well that the changes will only multiply from here.
But I think that's why the Lord tells us two are better than one, don't you? Because sometimes one just can't do it. One needs another. Another one to help lighten the load or shoulder the burden. One needs another to tell them, "Hey, it's okay. You're not a failure at all. You're doing something amazing, and you know what, I'm here to help you. I love you not because of what you do but because of who you are to me." And sometimes one just needs another to hold their hand and, in the silence, understand. To listen to their concerns, to support their dreams, to cheer them on when they're ready to give up, and to remind them that together, they can accomplish much.
"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up." - Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
We celebrated one of my co-workers today who will be getting married on Saturday. There's nothing that will conjures up more memories of your own day than celebrating a bride to be. Aaron and I will celebrate our 3 year anniversary next month (Can you believe that?), and I reminisced a bit about our wedding day. Truth be told, I wish I could go back every single year and live that day out. It was perfect. One of the best days of my life, hands down, and I've had a lot of really great days! I still remember every moment of the day so well, and I remember how excited I was to hear Aaron's vows. We wrote our own vows, but we didn't share them before our wedding day. I am all about surprises, so I wanted there to be an element of surprise as we listened to one another state our forever promises. Ironically enough, we'd written very similar vows. Not word for word, but you might have thought that we shared an outline. We didn't though. We just wrote what God placed on our hearts, and you know what, I look back on that day with such joy and gratitude because I knew that very day that next to following Jesus, I was making the best decision of my life.
You guys know our marriage isn't perfect. We don't think it is, and we don't pretend it is, either. We're just normal, ordinary, ornery people who really desire forever. But the longer I've known Aaron, and the more we've experienced together, the greater my appreciation for him grows. Because when you get married, you kind of know what to expect, but you've got a lot of figuring out to do. What I knew then, I loved, and so I felt confident that the things I'd learn I would come to love, too. But I also was guilty of thinking that my actions not only proved my love but made me lovable. I'm no domestic goddess, and I'll probably never be. I manage, but there's always someone who can do it better, right? Yet I would find myself thinking that if I could cook him dinner, keep his laundry basket from overflowing, keep the pantry stocked, and the house from looking like train wreck, then I was winning as wife. And so these past few weeks have been full of little self imposed guilt trips as I've watched the dust begin to layer on the furniture while laying in bed sleeping off my take out dinner before calling it a night.
Yet each night, Aaron takes our dishes to the sink and begins cleaning the kitchen. He has gone to pick up dinner if I've asked, or he's come home from a tiring day to cook dinner as I stand on the other side of the kitchen reading instructions because I can't stomach the look of raw meat. He has picked up the house as I've slept. He's brought me breakfast burritos to eat in bed after running his errands on Saturday mornings. He has rubbed my back, my feet, and spent many uneventful nights laying next to me in bed as I doze off and on between Netflix reruns. He has stepped up where I have stepped down, and he's never one said a word about my lazy ways as I have apologized over and over again for not doing my part. He has carried the weight that I've been too tired to hold up, and he's been ever so patient and kind as we're both entering into unchartered territory knowing full well that the changes will only multiply from here.
But I think that's why the Lord tells us two are better than one, don't you? Because sometimes one just can't do it. One needs another. Another one to help lighten the load or shoulder the burden. One needs another to tell them, "Hey, it's okay. You're not a failure at all. You're doing something amazing, and you know what, I'm here to help you. I love you not because of what you do but because of who you are to me." And sometimes one just needs another to hold their hand and, in the silence, understand. To listen to their concerns, to support their dreams, to cheer them on when they're ready to give up, and to remind them that together, they can accomplish much.
"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up." - Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
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