burdensome blessings...
Madelyn, you're 5 months old! Where has the time gone? They say children grow quickly, but I think the second child grows faster than the first. At least, that seems to be the case in our house. The first five months of your life have flown by, and I can hardly believe we're almost half way through your first year of life. But, just as is the case with your sister, each month with you gets better and better!
You are the happiest girl. Really. You are. You are so happy and smile... all. the. time! And we don't have to work for smiles with you. You give smiles freely and generously. Over the past month you've found your voice and your toes. You don't talk a lot, but when you do, you make up for it. You've got quite the set of vocal cords, and that's a good thing. You're definitely going to need those in this house. You still love to be kissed, but you also love giving kisses. Your dad and I kiss you about a thousand times a day, and each time we come towards you with puckered lips, you open your mouth as wide as you can and try to catch us with it. Often time, you'll put your little hands on my face and bring it towards your for a big, slobbery, wet kiss. I'll take as many as you'd like to give.
You've started noticing Annabeth more and seem very fascinated with her. She goes back and forth with the amount of attention she gives you, but it is increasing in bits. I think you two are going to be sweet friends and play mates (I hope) soon. A few weeks ago she enjoyed dressing you up as a glamorous unicorn. And she is always very concerned about you when you cry. She also wants to be sure we don't leave without you, and she is definitely not okay with anyone taking you or calling you their baby. She tries to tickle you, and she's started willingly sharing her things with you without any prompting from me. She still doesn't want to kiss or cuddle you, but it took her a while to do those things with me, so just be patient... it will happen.
You tried baby cereal for the first time this month and were not a fan. You love sitting up, and you even try to stand when you get a chance. You rolled over on your own for the first time today, which was especially impressive considering you hardly spend any time on the floor. Also, I have completely failed to do scheduled tummy time with you on a daily basis (and by that I mean I have done it maybe 5 times since you came home), but you're a strong gal and have been since the day you were born. You still love bath time, and you've stuck pretty well to your self-made schedule. You have the most precious spirit, and I am enjoying every moment of watching your little personality develop.
We had a big transition this month as Annabeth started PDO. The nice thing about it is that you and I have a little more one-on-one time to spend together. One of the biggest challenges I have faced as a mother of two is feeling like I can't give both of you equal amounts of attention. Thankfully, neither of you seem to have an issue with my current process, but there are many moments where I feel like you're getting the short end of the stick. And so I feel like we get to make up for a bit on these days. I sure miss her when she's gone, but I'm grateful for our time together. I don't want to miss a special moment with either one of you, and I thank God on a daily basis for the blessing of being home during this season of both of your lives.
A few weeks ago, your dad and I volunteered serving dinner at a soup kitchen. Our church sponsored the meals during the summer and the Sunday School classes took turns serving each week. I have learned that many service opportunities that I used to do on a regular basis are now much more difficult and complicated with children. Even so, I try not to let that always be an excuse - especially with all of the babysitters we have on hand. I made arrangements for you and Annabeth that evening and met your dad at the soup kitchen. We stayed about an hour, passing out dinner plates full of fried chicken and comfort food and then we bused the tables and threw away trash. It was a simple and quick assignment that has been refined down to a smooth operation. This particular kitchen serves dinner every Wednesday night, so many of the people were likely regulars who knew their way around. Sitting at large tables with their friends, families, and maybe strangers, they ate their meals quickly and left quietly. As your dad and I walked out to our cars the conversation went like this:
"What do you want for dinner?"
"Well, I didn't have time to get anything prepared before I left the house so I'll stop by and pick up dinner on the way home. After smelling that chicken, I'm now craving it. Sound good to you?"
"Sounds good to me. See you at home!"
We came home, sat down as a family at the table, opened our boxes of chicken and french fries, and ate the dinner of our choice in the comfort of our home.
Here's the truth Madelyn, I have come to dislike cooking dinner. Before children, I didn't mind it because it was a way I could unwind from the day. Your dad and I would work in the kitchen together, leisurely preparing a meal that we would slowly enjoy, and it was very relaxing. After dinner was over, we'd sit at the table and talk or we'd clean the dishes and go on a walk with a full night ahead of us. But dinner these days is a real ordeal. I have to get myself psyched up to get in the kitchen and cook. It's a good thing we usually get a nap in the afternoons so I have the energy and mental focus to prepare a meal. And the thing is, we aren't eating elaborate meals. They're home cooked, but they're simple. Yet the preparation is not only stressful but rushed because I usually have a baby on my hip and a toddler destroying the kitchen while I attempt to put together something edible for our family. We sit down and inhale our food as either your dad or I bounce you on a knee while your sister interrupts any form of conversation that might be taking place. She rarely eats anything I cook, and you're on a tight schedule so the moment we finish eating, your dad is off to bathe you while I rush to clean the dishes.
But as I came home that night and thought about the soup kitchen, my heart was convicted at my lack of gratitude for the blessings God has given me. Because it is a blessing to have a home. A blessing to have a working kitchen full of pots and pans and every cooking utensil I could possibly need. A blessing to have a refrigerator to store our food and a pantry that is fully stocked. And although I'm no Pioneer Woman, it is a blessing to have the ability to cook a meal for my family and then, even if it's a little hectic, to sit around the table and eat together each night. And on the nights that I don't have a meal prepared, or those nights that I just don't feel like cooking, it's a blessing to choose which restaurant we want to dine at. To treat our taste buds to the exact food they're craving. A blessing that is often overlooked and underappreciated.
It's easy to allow our blessings to become burdens. To appreciate them for a short while until the newness wears off. And then they become routine and expected and we take them for granted. We forget that these blessings are often something we desperately longed for and prayed for, and that these blessings are not owed to us. We allow these blessings to weigh heavy on us because they are no longer seen through the lens of gratitude.
But God's word tell us to be thankful in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5). That's His will. That we always give thanks. That we show gratitude in every area of our life because all that we have comes from Him. And just as He gives, He also has the ability to take away. We are not guaranteed the blessings we currently have, and we are not entitled to any of them. They are exactly that - blessings, gifts, and privileges from God not to be taken lightly but to be accepted and appreciated with a thankful heart.
You are the happiest girl. Really. You are. You are so happy and smile... all. the. time! And we don't have to work for smiles with you. You give smiles freely and generously. Over the past month you've found your voice and your toes. You don't talk a lot, but when you do, you make up for it. You've got quite the set of vocal cords, and that's a good thing. You're definitely going to need those in this house. You still love to be kissed, but you also love giving kisses. Your dad and I kiss you about a thousand times a day, and each time we come towards you with puckered lips, you open your mouth as wide as you can and try to catch us with it. Often time, you'll put your little hands on my face and bring it towards your for a big, slobbery, wet kiss. I'll take as many as you'd like to give.
You've started noticing Annabeth more and seem very fascinated with her. She goes back and forth with the amount of attention she gives you, but it is increasing in bits. I think you two are going to be sweet friends and play mates (I hope) soon. A few weeks ago she enjoyed dressing you up as a glamorous unicorn. And she is always very concerned about you when you cry. She also wants to be sure we don't leave without you, and she is definitely not okay with anyone taking you or calling you their baby. She tries to tickle you, and she's started willingly sharing her things with you without any prompting from me. She still doesn't want to kiss or cuddle you, but it took her a while to do those things with me, so just be patient... it will happen.
You tried baby cereal for the first time this month and were not a fan. You love sitting up, and you even try to stand when you get a chance. You rolled over on your own for the first time today, which was especially impressive considering you hardly spend any time on the floor. Also, I have completely failed to do scheduled tummy time with you on a daily basis (and by that I mean I have done it maybe 5 times since you came home), but you're a strong gal and have been since the day you were born. You still love bath time, and you've stuck pretty well to your self-made schedule. You have the most precious spirit, and I am enjoying every moment of watching your little personality develop.
We had a big transition this month as Annabeth started PDO. The nice thing about it is that you and I have a little more one-on-one time to spend together. One of the biggest challenges I have faced as a mother of two is feeling like I can't give both of you equal amounts of attention. Thankfully, neither of you seem to have an issue with my current process, but there are many moments where I feel like you're getting the short end of the stick. And so I feel like we get to make up for a bit on these days. I sure miss her when she's gone, but I'm grateful for our time together. I don't want to miss a special moment with either one of you, and I thank God on a daily basis for the blessing of being home during this season of both of your lives.
A few weeks ago, your dad and I volunteered serving dinner at a soup kitchen. Our church sponsored the meals during the summer and the Sunday School classes took turns serving each week. I have learned that many service opportunities that I used to do on a regular basis are now much more difficult and complicated with children. Even so, I try not to let that always be an excuse - especially with all of the babysitters we have on hand. I made arrangements for you and Annabeth that evening and met your dad at the soup kitchen. We stayed about an hour, passing out dinner plates full of fried chicken and comfort food and then we bused the tables and threw away trash. It was a simple and quick assignment that has been refined down to a smooth operation. This particular kitchen serves dinner every Wednesday night, so many of the people were likely regulars who knew their way around. Sitting at large tables with their friends, families, and maybe strangers, they ate their meals quickly and left quietly. As your dad and I walked out to our cars the conversation went like this:
"What do you want for dinner?"
"Well, I didn't have time to get anything prepared before I left the house so I'll stop by and pick up dinner on the way home. After smelling that chicken, I'm now craving it. Sound good to you?"
"Sounds good to me. See you at home!"
We came home, sat down as a family at the table, opened our boxes of chicken and french fries, and ate the dinner of our choice in the comfort of our home.
Here's the truth Madelyn, I have come to dislike cooking dinner. Before children, I didn't mind it because it was a way I could unwind from the day. Your dad and I would work in the kitchen together, leisurely preparing a meal that we would slowly enjoy, and it was very relaxing. After dinner was over, we'd sit at the table and talk or we'd clean the dishes and go on a walk with a full night ahead of us. But dinner these days is a real ordeal. I have to get myself psyched up to get in the kitchen and cook. It's a good thing we usually get a nap in the afternoons so I have the energy and mental focus to prepare a meal. And the thing is, we aren't eating elaborate meals. They're home cooked, but they're simple. Yet the preparation is not only stressful but rushed because I usually have a baby on my hip and a toddler destroying the kitchen while I attempt to put together something edible for our family. We sit down and inhale our food as either your dad or I bounce you on a knee while your sister interrupts any form of conversation that might be taking place. She rarely eats anything I cook, and you're on a tight schedule so the moment we finish eating, your dad is off to bathe you while I rush to clean the dishes.
But as I came home that night and thought about the soup kitchen, my heart was convicted at my lack of gratitude for the blessings God has given me. Because it is a blessing to have a home. A blessing to have a working kitchen full of pots and pans and every cooking utensil I could possibly need. A blessing to have a refrigerator to store our food and a pantry that is fully stocked. And although I'm no Pioneer Woman, it is a blessing to have the ability to cook a meal for my family and then, even if it's a little hectic, to sit around the table and eat together each night. And on the nights that I don't have a meal prepared, or those nights that I just don't feel like cooking, it's a blessing to choose which restaurant we want to dine at. To treat our taste buds to the exact food they're craving. A blessing that is often overlooked and underappreciated.
It's easy to allow our blessings to become burdens. To appreciate them for a short while until the newness wears off. And then they become routine and expected and we take them for granted. We forget that these blessings are often something we desperately longed for and prayed for, and that these blessings are not owed to us. We allow these blessings to weigh heavy on us because they are no longer seen through the lens of gratitude.
But God's word tell us to be thankful in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5). That's His will. That we always give thanks. That we show gratitude in every area of our life because all that we have comes from Him. And just as He gives, He also has the ability to take away. We are not guaranteed the blessings we currently have, and we are not entitled to any of them. They are exactly that - blessings, gifts, and privileges from God not to be taken lightly but to be accepted and appreciated with a thankful heart.
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