When people make you mad or hurt your feelings... because it's bound to happen...

“In your anger do not sin.” Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold." - Ephesians 4:26-27

 

There are things in life that really upset me. There have been moments where I’ve lost my cool. Sometimes, it happens a lot faster than it should. Sometimes, it follow moments of sadness. My feelings will be hurt, something will upset me, and the longer I’m upset, the more mad I become. You hear little sayings like, “Don’t get mad, get glad.” It’s best to never use those sayings in the heat of the moment, you know. But it does hold some truth. Because being mad and being glad are both choices. No one can really “make” you glad or mad, you’re the one who determines how you feel.

 

Hurt people, hurt people. We all know this. People usually lash out because they’re hurting or upset. Catch them on a different day, under a different circumstance, and they’d likely respond in a more positive manner. But anger plays interesting tricks on our minds. Anger leads us to believe that we’re on our own. We’ve got to fight. We’ve got to put up a wall. Anger leads us to believe everyone is against us when they’re really not. It causes us to say things we’d never say otherwise. To treat people in ways in which we’re later ashamed of. Anger gives us an unfortunate amount of mean courage when we least need it, and anger, while it usually doesn’t last forever, can certainly do a lot of damage during its stint.

 

It’s okay to be mad. It is a human emotion, and in fact, both Jesus and God got mad. Anyone remember that little table-flipping story in Luke 19? Or what about Sodom and Gomorrah, the flood and Noah? Anger is a natural response when we feel wronged, but God’s word tells us not to stay angry or to let our anger cause sin. Of course, God requires things from us that aren’t always easy. Let’s be honest, it’s easy to be mad. It’s easy to react negatively. It takes incredible resolve to stay calm, collected, and merciful when we feel hurt or wronged. And the longer we feel hurt or wronged, the harder it is to keep from getting mad. And the longer we’re mad, the harder it is to let it go… ever. But God desires His people to live in freedom, and that includes freedom from anger.

 

The truth is, anger does no good. Anger eats away at your joy. It robs you of peace. It allows bitterness to grow in your heart, and anger keeps you miserable. And although we might think it’s justified, many times the other party isn’t even aware of our anger. We really spend time punishing ourselves, although we can easily lead ourselves to believe that our resentment is doing damage to our offender. But they’ve usually moved on, and you’re stuck in the past reliving it. They aren’t concerning themselves with the situation, and you’re eaten up with the memories of it.

 

So if it’s okay to feel upset, but it’s not okay to stay that way, what do we do? Well, as Elsa would say, “Let it go.” We let it go. We lay it down at Jesus’ feet. We hand it over to him, and we exchange it for His peace. Peace that surpasses understanding. Peace that can help us heal and move forward. Peace that coddles our tender heart and reminds us that we will be okay. We don’t have to hold on to anger and let it rule our lives. No, we let Jesus rule and reign in our lives, leaving no room for the anger to reside. It may take a while. You may have to lay it down over and over again because, trust me, you’re going to be tempted to pick it back up every now and them. But just leave it there. Let him deal with it. Give him time, and it will lessen. It doesn’t mean you’ll forget. It doesn’t mean it may not be a sensitive spot, but you’ll be able to deal with it. You’ll be able to control it rather than letting it control you. And you’ll come to see that life is better when you let go of the past, leaving it where it belongs, and live in the freedom Jesus died to give you. Always choose that option above anger. It will greatly benefit you.