Reason #532

I could not be happier for a week to be over than this one. I don't think today could have been more stressful had it tried. We had a skeleton crew at work, and I believe most of Lubbock chose to come in and do their banking today...angry, long, drawn-out banking. Remember my post about the way you talk to other people when you're frustrated? Well, I had to transfer a phone call today because I was about to "accidentally" disconnect from the individuals who decided to call 5 minutes until 5:00 and demand, yell, threaten, and talk down to me as I tried my best to help them with an issue they created for themselves.

I left work and my blood was pumping. I went to pick up Scout from the groomers, and they managed to get her hair so short this time that you can see her pink skin on the top of her head. And so my scrappy dog and I drove home, and 2 hours later I found myself sitting in a dusty rocking chair on the front porch trying to find some sort of peace. I'll say the night was beautiful and for almost an hour I closed my eyes and I rocked back and forth, back and forth. I came inside to eat cereal straight from the cereal box and mourned the fact that this was how I was ending my week and starting my weekend.

I won't lie, sometimes I just feel I'm at the end of my rope. It's moments like these that I look at my mother and admire her even more. I don't know how she does such a good job of keeping life so productive and organized. I swear I'll probably have to wait until I'm 50 to have kids. I just feel like I'll never get it together. I get tired of taking care of customers, a house, laundry, dishes, bills, food, and even myself. I get to the point where I just don't want to do anything. But I suppose if we all went through life just doing the things we wanted to when we wanted to, we'd all be smelly, dirty, wrinkly, past due, and we wouldn't get very far. And so I just sat in that dirt covered chair tonight asking God to give me a word, some comfort, some peace... I don't care, just something!

All week long a song has been stuck in my head. I know God has bigger fish to fry and way more important requests being offered up. There are people dying every day, world hunger, illness, loss, corruption, financial crisis of all sorts, and so my little emotional outbursts seem minor, right? You're probably thinking, "Get over yourself, sister. You're fine and you just need an attitude adjustment. Starting acting and thinking more positively." I thought the same thing, too. But I'm just like you and sometimes I just have a rough day, a rough week. Sometimes I am overly emotional and sensitive. I'm not always positive and happy, although I wish I was. But as I started thinking of this song, I started to quietly hum the chorus. "Whatever will come our way, through fire or pouring rain. We won't be shaken. We won't be shaken." And I realized that the word 'whatever' encompasses a lot of possibilities. It could be something small, something personal, something drastic and really public. It could be something hurtful, humiliating, challenging or seemingly insignificant. It could be something surprising, something that's been brewing for a while. something unthinkable, or something no one will ever know about but you. It can be whatever. Because things come our way, and we are not limited to a certain number or time. We're people who live in a fallen world, selfish individuals covered in flesh, and inevitably something will happen. Whether it's to us or created by us, we aren't immune to dealing with tough stuff and hard feelings in this life. And so you may be thinking, "what the heck is she even getting at here?" I don't know. It's just been one of those 'whatever' days. But I realize that the one good thing about having those days is that they only last for a day, and we serve a God who is willing to take on those "whatever's" when they come and give us the strength and determination to get through them.

You are going to face "whatever's" in life and you don't always want to deal with them. It's tough sometimes to do the things you don't want to do and to do even if you know you need to do them. But we serve a God who will do something with those "whatever's." Who knows how to get us through them if we'll let him. And He'll take whatever comes your way and He'll turn it into something valuable, something beautiful, something for your benefit. And so the next time you think "whatever" just give it to the Lord and allow Him to turn it into something better.

#532 - For a God who can turn a whatever into something better.

"Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken." - Psalm 62:5-6

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