Reason #666
I hope I can make it through this one. My eyelids are so heavy, and all I can think about is that I'll be able to fall asleep when I'm finished here. We traveled home today, which wasn't bad at all, but there's just something about laying down in my own bed that makes me tired. It's good to be home, and it's good to be ending my night in my favorite way.
I'll admit, I couldn't wait to see Scout today. Although I am sure she missed us while we were away, I could tell that she enjoyed her vacation, too. In fact, I think she put on a few vacation pounds as well. That's what grandparents are notorious for. Anyway, I couldn't wait to pick her up and squeeze her. She's always a little stand-off-ish when we come back from a trip, and I think it's her way of letting us know she was not happy that we were gone for so long. I could be totally wrong here, but that seems to be the trend. Either way, she squealed and barked with excitement all the way out to the car. She didn't hide her true feelings about seeing us, and I was just as happy to see her!
Dogs are such a little ego booster. Seriously, they know how to lift your spirits. One of the things I love about Scout is that she acts like I am the most important person in the world. It doesn't matter how I look, how I act, what I am capable of, or what I can't do, she still views me the same. That's the beauty of having a pet. They never get mad at you or hold things against you, and they think the world of you all the time. It's nice to be viewed as such an important and significant person, and to be held in such high esteem, even if it is by your dog.
Sometimes I really deal with feeling insignificant. This isn't news to you. I've written a good number of posts about this. I'm still trying to get a grip on this one, so forgive me for sounding repetitive. Today, I really felt it in a big way. Truth be told, I felt it Monday and Tuesday, too. Why, you may ask? Because for three days I will have missed work, and it won't matter. No one needed me. No one will have needed me. No one probably even noticed I was gone. And for the past three days, I leisurely strolled around a huge hotel (which I really did enjoy) full of significant business professionals. A few thousand people that all have titles, rank, position, and subordinates. People who are working when they aren't at work because, well, they are that much of a necessity. People who spend their free time checking their emails and making phone calls to their place of employment because they can't afford to actually take time off. People who wear nice business suits and high heels. Who lug around laptops and portfolios full of valuable information that is selectively shared. And, on Monday, I wandered around in shorts and a t-shirt, sporting a sloppy pony tail, and the only thing I had access to check was Facebook.
So here's the deal, I'll never manage people. I'll never be a high powered executive. I'll probably never even have a need to receive my work email on my phone. I won't be sitting in on important meetings. No one is going to ask me to take on a really big, significant project or to lead a team on a new endeavor. I highly doubt I'll sit on a board or make organizational decisions. I'll probably never speak in front of a crowd in a professional setting. No company is, or has, ever sought me out to come work for them. I'm pretty positive that I'll never call the shots or have a company wide impact where I work. And, truth be told, I'm sure that if I ever end up having to move or leave, my absence won't really be that detrimental.
Sometimes I sit back and think, "Is this really it? Is this what my professional life is amounting to?" I know that life is not about work, but when that's where you spend 40 hours of your week, it sure feels like it. And sometimes I get really frustrated because I feel like I can't get to where I want to be. People ask me what I want to do, and I don't really even want to talk about it with them because I feel like it's never going to happen. I don't really see how I would even get there, and truth be told, I just don't think it's a possibility for me. I know that hard work pays off, but if you ask me, sometimes it seems like it's luck more than hard work. And so, yea, I look at this area of my life and I don't understand it. It was not what I had expected, and it's definitely not what I saw for my future. But, if I'm being honest, that's exactly how my entire life has gone - not as originally planned.
Well, it's a good thing I finally cracked open my bible on Tuesday. God is so gracious and faithful to bring to my mind a lot of comforting truths when these depressing thoughts being to set in. And so here's what God reminded me of today as I sat on a plane ride home feeling a little sorry for myself. Moses was really ordinary. Actually, he was flawed. He was absolutely not the perfect man for the job he had when you put it on paper. Moses wasn't very dynamic. He really hadn't accomplished much of anything good when he stood before God at the burning bush. Moses didn't have a stellar "resume," or any good references. And here he was, just being completely ordinary and human, and God called him to a really big, important, life changing job.
The same goes for Joshua, too. He was just wandering along in the desert with the rest of Israel. He hadn't really done anything to get noticed. As far as I know, I don't recall reading anything special about Joshua. I am not aware of any extraordinary talents of gifts that he possessed. But He trusted the Lord, and he was obedient to follow the Lord daily. And, as you well know, this regular guy was entrusted with the job of picking up where Moses would leave off, and he would lead God's people into the Promised Land.
You see, I forget that it takes time. God entrusts us with His work when He's ready for said task to be carried out. Some of us know what God's call on our life is early on. The rest of us, like me, are still trying to figure it out. Who knows when God will make that clear, but until then, we just need to be like Moses and Joshua. We need to live our lives for God. We need to trust Him and be obedient to anything He asks us to do, big or small. We need to be willing to go when He call us, and we need to continue to follow Him no matter what. Some tasks are bigger than others, some calls draw more attention than others. Thank goodness that God doesn't care. Thank goodness that He isn't concerned with the number of people we are leading, with our work places titles, with the length of our resume (or lack thereof), or with the size of our paychecks. God is concerned about our faithful obedience day in and day out. With our consistent walks and our unwavering faith. And I'm just grateful that our real worth and importance is not based on the number of emails we get, the amount of big meetings we sit in on, or how many people report to us. Because we can't all do the same thing, work in the same place, or have the same job. But, we can be faithful to do whatever it is God has called us to do and realize that ultimately, He will decide when and where we are called.
#666 - Because wherever God calls us is important.
"But Moses pleaded with the Lord, “O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled.” Then the Lord asked Moses, “Who makes a person’s mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say.” - Exodus 4:10-12
I'll admit, I couldn't wait to see Scout today. Although I am sure she missed us while we were away, I could tell that she enjoyed her vacation, too. In fact, I think she put on a few vacation pounds as well. That's what grandparents are notorious for. Anyway, I couldn't wait to pick her up and squeeze her. She's always a little stand-off-ish when we come back from a trip, and I think it's her way of letting us know she was not happy that we were gone for so long. I could be totally wrong here, but that seems to be the trend. Either way, she squealed and barked with excitement all the way out to the car. She didn't hide her true feelings about seeing us, and I was just as happy to see her!
Dogs are such a little ego booster. Seriously, they know how to lift your spirits. One of the things I love about Scout is that she acts like I am the most important person in the world. It doesn't matter how I look, how I act, what I am capable of, or what I can't do, she still views me the same. That's the beauty of having a pet. They never get mad at you or hold things against you, and they think the world of you all the time. It's nice to be viewed as such an important and significant person, and to be held in such high esteem, even if it is by your dog.
Sometimes I really deal with feeling insignificant. This isn't news to you. I've written a good number of posts about this. I'm still trying to get a grip on this one, so forgive me for sounding repetitive. Today, I really felt it in a big way. Truth be told, I felt it Monday and Tuesday, too. Why, you may ask? Because for three days I will have missed work, and it won't matter. No one needed me. No one will have needed me. No one probably even noticed I was gone. And for the past three days, I leisurely strolled around a huge hotel (which I really did enjoy) full of significant business professionals. A few thousand people that all have titles, rank, position, and subordinates. People who are working when they aren't at work because, well, they are that much of a necessity. People who spend their free time checking their emails and making phone calls to their place of employment because they can't afford to actually take time off. People who wear nice business suits and high heels. Who lug around laptops and portfolios full of valuable information that is selectively shared. And, on Monday, I wandered around in shorts and a t-shirt, sporting a sloppy pony tail, and the only thing I had access to check was Facebook.
So here's the deal, I'll never manage people. I'll never be a high powered executive. I'll probably never even have a need to receive my work email on my phone. I won't be sitting in on important meetings. No one is going to ask me to take on a really big, significant project or to lead a team on a new endeavor. I highly doubt I'll sit on a board or make organizational decisions. I'll probably never speak in front of a crowd in a professional setting. No company is, or has, ever sought me out to come work for them. I'm pretty positive that I'll never call the shots or have a company wide impact where I work. And, truth be told, I'm sure that if I ever end up having to move or leave, my absence won't really be that detrimental.
Sometimes I sit back and think, "Is this really it? Is this what my professional life is amounting to?" I know that life is not about work, but when that's where you spend 40 hours of your week, it sure feels like it. And sometimes I get really frustrated because I feel like I can't get to where I want to be. People ask me what I want to do, and I don't really even want to talk about it with them because I feel like it's never going to happen. I don't really see how I would even get there, and truth be told, I just don't think it's a possibility for me. I know that hard work pays off, but if you ask me, sometimes it seems like it's luck more than hard work. And so, yea, I look at this area of my life and I don't understand it. It was not what I had expected, and it's definitely not what I saw for my future. But, if I'm being honest, that's exactly how my entire life has gone - not as originally planned.
Well, it's a good thing I finally cracked open my bible on Tuesday. God is so gracious and faithful to bring to my mind a lot of comforting truths when these depressing thoughts being to set in. And so here's what God reminded me of today as I sat on a plane ride home feeling a little sorry for myself. Moses was really ordinary. Actually, he was flawed. He was absolutely not the perfect man for the job he had when you put it on paper. Moses wasn't very dynamic. He really hadn't accomplished much of anything good when he stood before God at the burning bush. Moses didn't have a stellar "resume," or any good references. And here he was, just being completely ordinary and human, and God called him to a really big, important, life changing job.
The same goes for Joshua, too. He was just wandering along in the desert with the rest of Israel. He hadn't really done anything to get noticed. As far as I know, I don't recall reading anything special about Joshua. I am not aware of any extraordinary talents of gifts that he possessed. But He trusted the Lord, and he was obedient to follow the Lord daily. And, as you well know, this regular guy was entrusted with the job of picking up where Moses would leave off, and he would lead God's people into the Promised Land.
You see, I forget that it takes time. God entrusts us with His work when He's ready for said task to be carried out. Some of us know what God's call on our life is early on. The rest of us, like me, are still trying to figure it out. Who knows when God will make that clear, but until then, we just need to be like Moses and Joshua. We need to live our lives for God. We need to trust Him and be obedient to anything He asks us to do, big or small. We need to be willing to go when He call us, and we need to continue to follow Him no matter what. Some tasks are bigger than others, some calls draw more attention than others. Thank goodness that God doesn't care. Thank goodness that He isn't concerned with the number of people we are leading, with our work places titles, with the length of our resume (or lack thereof), or with the size of our paychecks. God is concerned about our faithful obedience day in and day out. With our consistent walks and our unwavering faith. And I'm just grateful that our real worth and importance is not based on the number of emails we get, the amount of big meetings we sit in on, or how many people report to us. Because we can't all do the same thing, work in the same place, or have the same job. But, we can be faithful to do whatever it is God has called us to do and realize that ultimately, He will decide when and where we are called.
#666 - Because wherever God calls us is important.
"But Moses pleaded with the Lord, “O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled.” Then the Lord asked Moses, “Who makes a person’s mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say.” - Exodus 4:10-12
Comments
Post a Comment