Reason #495
I am tired. We hit the ground running the moment we got home from our honeymoon, and there hasn't been a down moment since. Truthfully, the only night I was able to be a bum and lay on the couch was due to a bladder infection, so I don't count that one. After another night of continuing the never-ending house organization saga, I ended up my time with session 2 of the new workout program I started on Monday. Not necessarily my favorite way to finish the night, but I suppose I needed it. I've been walking around like a crippled duck for two days now because my legs are so sore, so maybe that worked some of the soreness out. My "virtual personal trainer" said I should see results in 4 weeks. We'll see. Anyway, I'm just glad to finally be in bed. It's nice to lay down and know that you'll be staring at the back of your eyelids within an hour.
I usually like to speak in secret analogy lingo when I write my blogs because I never know who is reading them. But sometimes it's just easier to be blunt and specific. Tonight is one of those nights, and tonight I want to discuss work.
I went to college thinking I would graduate with this incredible degree. You know, maybe do law school or at least get my masters. I had set goals for myself. I wanted to do something with my life. I wanted to make a noticeable difference in my career. And, I'm not going to lie, I wanted people, namely my family, to be really proud of what I did. "This is our daughter, Dr. Brittnye... This is our daughter, she's a DA...our daughter works for XZY Company running the corporate headquarters..." You get the idea. Anyway, I wanted to be impressive. I wanted to be proud of myself, too. Feel like I really accomplished something. Now, don't get me wrong, a college degree is an accomplishment in itself, but now a days, a bachelor's is expected. Just going to college doesn't quite have the impact it used to. If you want to get noticed, you need to at least have your masters so a few letters can trail your name. Well, I made the decision to graduate in 3.5 years, which I would change if I could, and ever since then I've really struggled to find where I belong.
I've joked with my girlfriends that I'm just not cut out for the working world. But the truth is, I think I feel that way because I haven't found my niche. I haven't found the place where I really feel like I am making a difference. Because truth be told, at any of my jobs, when I left, life went on. In fact, it really didn't even take hardly any looking to fill the spot. I've chosen to stick with the banking industry, which I've enjoyed the most, but there are days where I really struggle. Days where I just think, "Why am I even here? They don't need me. They'd be fine without me. I make no difference what-so-ever." Do you ever feel that way, too? Well, after an early morning meeting today, I left feeling low. Feeling like I'll never get anywhere, never get where I want to be, and I'll never really experience the true satisfaction that comes from having a job where you are needed, wanted, and your work really matters.
I thought by 25 I would have it figured out. I saw myself established with some sense of achievement. And as I drove to work after lunch, I realized how I was feeling. I began to think and pray about it, asking for an attitude adjustment. At 4:07PM, I got one. And as I read one of the kindest, most encouraging e-mails, I fought back tears. It had absolutely nothing to do with work. I had nothing to do with my career path, my education, my skills or abilities. You see, sometimes I get in my mind that if I am really going to make a difference in the world, it must be through my career. But that's not necessarily the truth. Some people will. Some people will make huge impacts on humanity because of their careers, and good for them! I'm thankful for really smart, hard-working, successful people. But then there are the rest of us. And God is teaching me that it's not a career. It's not a particular job or a particular company that's going to do the trick. Rather, it's just being obedient to follow Him daily and being open and willing that's going to make the difference. And no one may ever know. But He knows, and that's really all that matters when all is said and done.
I remember Ruth tonight. Ruth, who diligently followed and served the Lord day in and day out. Ruth, who was lower than a servant, a foreigner who didn't have a niche, who was under qualified, who was simple and humble, and she was used by God because of that. And Ruth had no idea at the time. She never knew the difference her life would make in the long run, but that didn't matter to her. She lived it for the Lord, and when we live our lives trying to please the Lord rather than pleasing man, it's amazing to see how much more useful we really do become.
#495 - For encouraging emails that serve as reminders of how God is working and moving.
"Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth." - 2 Timothy 2:15
"For I fully expect and hope that I will never be ashamed, but that I will continue to be bold for Christ, as I have been in the past. And I trust that my life will bring honor to Christ, whether I live or die." - Philippians 1:20
I usually like to speak in secret analogy lingo when I write my blogs because I never know who is reading them. But sometimes it's just easier to be blunt and specific. Tonight is one of those nights, and tonight I want to discuss work.
I went to college thinking I would graduate with this incredible degree. You know, maybe do law school or at least get my masters. I had set goals for myself. I wanted to do something with my life. I wanted to make a noticeable difference in my career. And, I'm not going to lie, I wanted people, namely my family, to be really proud of what I did. "This is our daughter, Dr. Brittnye... This is our daughter, she's a DA...our daughter works for XZY Company running the corporate headquarters..." You get the idea. Anyway, I wanted to be impressive. I wanted to be proud of myself, too. Feel like I really accomplished something. Now, don't get me wrong, a college degree is an accomplishment in itself, but now a days, a bachelor's is expected. Just going to college doesn't quite have the impact it used to. If you want to get noticed, you need to at least have your masters so a few letters can trail your name. Well, I made the decision to graduate in 3.5 years, which I would change if I could, and ever since then I've really struggled to find where I belong.
I've joked with my girlfriends that I'm just not cut out for the working world. But the truth is, I think I feel that way because I haven't found my niche. I haven't found the place where I really feel like I am making a difference. Because truth be told, at any of my jobs, when I left, life went on. In fact, it really didn't even take hardly any looking to fill the spot. I've chosen to stick with the banking industry, which I've enjoyed the most, but there are days where I really struggle. Days where I just think, "Why am I even here? They don't need me. They'd be fine without me. I make no difference what-so-ever." Do you ever feel that way, too? Well, after an early morning meeting today, I left feeling low. Feeling like I'll never get anywhere, never get where I want to be, and I'll never really experience the true satisfaction that comes from having a job where you are needed, wanted, and your work really matters.
I thought by 25 I would have it figured out. I saw myself established with some sense of achievement. And as I drove to work after lunch, I realized how I was feeling. I began to think and pray about it, asking for an attitude adjustment. At 4:07PM, I got one. And as I read one of the kindest, most encouraging e-mails, I fought back tears. It had absolutely nothing to do with work. I had nothing to do with my career path, my education, my skills or abilities. You see, sometimes I get in my mind that if I am really going to make a difference in the world, it must be through my career. But that's not necessarily the truth. Some people will. Some people will make huge impacts on humanity because of their careers, and good for them! I'm thankful for really smart, hard-working, successful people. But then there are the rest of us. And God is teaching me that it's not a career. It's not a particular job or a particular company that's going to do the trick. Rather, it's just being obedient to follow Him daily and being open and willing that's going to make the difference. And no one may ever know. But He knows, and that's really all that matters when all is said and done.
I remember Ruth tonight. Ruth, who diligently followed and served the Lord day in and day out. Ruth, who was lower than a servant, a foreigner who didn't have a niche, who was under qualified, who was simple and humble, and she was used by God because of that. And Ruth had no idea at the time. She never knew the difference her life would make in the long run, but that didn't matter to her. She lived it for the Lord, and when we live our lives trying to please the Lord rather than pleasing man, it's amazing to see how much more useful we really do become.
#495 - For encouraging emails that serve as reminders of how God is working and moving.
"Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth." - 2 Timothy 2:15
"For I fully expect and hope that I will never be ashamed, but that I will continue to be bold for Christ, as I have been in the past. And I trust that my life will bring honor to Christ, whether I live or die." - Philippians 1:20
Woo!! I made the blog! Discreetly anyway :)
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