Reason #624
Today was just what I needed. I stayed in bed until 11:00AM, and it was amazing! I haven't had an opportunity to sleep that late in a while. I've actually been looking forward to it all week. That's kind of sad, huh? Anyway, it has been a good day. A relaxing day. And, it was beautiful day, I might add.
I have to brag on Aaron tonight. I don't know many husbands who would have done what Aaron did today, so that's why I have to brag. I will definitely dare to say that I have one of the most selfless husbands around. He is so kind to always put my desires above his own, therefore, sacrificing the things he wants to do. And so today, after letting me sleep late, he patiently waited for me to get ready so we could catch the rest of the Tech game, and then left early so that we could go get massages.
Aaron and I are about half way through our Love and Respect bible study, and we've both been quite challenged by what we've learned. I am so thankful that we decided to do this study, even though it hasn't been easy. I've really learned a lot about myself and have had to make a conscious effort to change my behaviors and reactions. See, that's the thing about marriage. It really opens your eyes to your "flaws." Because when you're single, you can get away with pretty much anything. You can be as selfish and unrealistic as you want because you're the only person whose spending 24/7 with you. When you get married, that changes. Now, you can't cordially decide to "do your own thing" when you're annoyed with your significant other. No, you've got to come home to them, share your house with them, sleep in the same bed as them, and so pretending just doesn't cut it. They see all of you, good behavior and bad. And when you live with someone, it's near impossible to always keep them happy and pleased.
We've discovered that it's the small things, and it always is isn't it? The other person doesn't do things the way you want, does respond the way you think they should, says things in the wrong tone, or gives you the wrong look and the next thing you know... game on. Well, even though we know this, and we easily recognize it, doesn't mean we've figured out ways to prevent it. It just takes practice, and that practice only comes with opportunity.
Aaron and I still have a few things to do with our house. One of these days, we'll be finished... I hope. Anyway, we bought a TV bracket a few weeks ago and Aaron had some free time to hang the TV in our bedroom today. Now, Aaron is about 9 inches taller than I am so our view points are different, literally speaking. I so often forget that he can't read my mind and doesn't think like I do, and so I didn't bother to tell him how high to hang the TV. I came home and the TV was up, just up a little higher than I had envisioned. I had asked him to specifically accomplish this task while I was gone, and I was really grateful he did. He did a great job, too. And so it all came down to whether or not the TV stayed where it was, or whether he moved it. I didn't want to cause more work, but I also wanted my little vision for our bedroom to play out as imagined. An opportunity had presented itself.
Being the saint he is, Aaron didn't hesitate to take down the TV and drill new holes so that it could be moved. Neither one of us was right or wrong in this scenario, and both of us would have been able to live with whatever the outcome was. No one was going to die if the TV stayed where it was, and no one was going to die if it got moved. It wasn't the end of the world either way. But so often, in marriage, we let things like this get in the way because we want our way. We get upset that we weren't thinking on the same wave length and so we duke it out with one another. I knew I was causing more work. I knew that I was asking him to undo and redo the work he had already finished, and so I wouldn't have blamed him for getting upset with me. I wouldn't have blamed him for being annoyed. But he didn't get mad, didn't act annoyed. He said, "Okay, I'll move it down. Just help me real quick, and we'll get it fixed."
Practice makes perfect. We aren't perfect, we'll never be. But grace sure helps. Patience, too. And when it's practiced, it's usually what is received in return. And so I'm thankful for a patient, grace giving husband. And I'm thankful to serve a God who sets that example for us. A God who not only shows us patience and grace day in and day out, but also helps us to show it to one another. One opportunity down, many more to go, but I think we're starting to get the hang of it.
#624 - For opportunities to receive grace and patience.
"Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a city." - Psalm 16:32
I have to brag on Aaron tonight. I don't know many husbands who would have done what Aaron did today, so that's why I have to brag. I will definitely dare to say that I have one of the most selfless husbands around. He is so kind to always put my desires above his own, therefore, sacrificing the things he wants to do. And so today, after letting me sleep late, he patiently waited for me to get ready so we could catch the rest of the Tech game, and then left early so that we could go get massages.
Aaron and I are about half way through our Love and Respect bible study, and we've both been quite challenged by what we've learned. I am so thankful that we decided to do this study, even though it hasn't been easy. I've really learned a lot about myself and have had to make a conscious effort to change my behaviors and reactions. See, that's the thing about marriage. It really opens your eyes to your "flaws." Because when you're single, you can get away with pretty much anything. You can be as selfish and unrealistic as you want because you're the only person whose spending 24/7 with you. When you get married, that changes. Now, you can't cordially decide to "do your own thing" when you're annoyed with your significant other. No, you've got to come home to them, share your house with them, sleep in the same bed as them, and so pretending just doesn't cut it. They see all of you, good behavior and bad. And when you live with someone, it's near impossible to always keep them happy and pleased.
We've discovered that it's the small things, and it always is isn't it? The other person doesn't do things the way you want, does respond the way you think they should, says things in the wrong tone, or gives you the wrong look and the next thing you know... game on. Well, even though we know this, and we easily recognize it, doesn't mean we've figured out ways to prevent it. It just takes practice, and that practice only comes with opportunity.
Aaron and I still have a few things to do with our house. One of these days, we'll be finished... I hope. Anyway, we bought a TV bracket a few weeks ago and Aaron had some free time to hang the TV in our bedroom today. Now, Aaron is about 9 inches taller than I am so our view points are different, literally speaking. I so often forget that he can't read my mind and doesn't think like I do, and so I didn't bother to tell him how high to hang the TV. I came home and the TV was up, just up a little higher than I had envisioned. I had asked him to specifically accomplish this task while I was gone, and I was really grateful he did. He did a great job, too. And so it all came down to whether or not the TV stayed where it was, or whether he moved it. I didn't want to cause more work, but I also wanted my little vision for our bedroom to play out as imagined. An opportunity had presented itself.
Being the saint he is, Aaron didn't hesitate to take down the TV and drill new holes so that it could be moved. Neither one of us was right or wrong in this scenario, and both of us would have been able to live with whatever the outcome was. No one was going to die if the TV stayed where it was, and no one was going to die if it got moved. It wasn't the end of the world either way. But so often, in marriage, we let things like this get in the way because we want our way. We get upset that we weren't thinking on the same wave length and so we duke it out with one another. I knew I was causing more work. I knew that I was asking him to undo and redo the work he had already finished, and so I wouldn't have blamed him for getting upset with me. I wouldn't have blamed him for being annoyed. But he didn't get mad, didn't act annoyed. He said, "Okay, I'll move it down. Just help me real quick, and we'll get it fixed."
Practice makes perfect. We aren't perfect, we'll never be. But grace sure helps. Patience, too. And when it's practiced, it's usually what is received in return. And so I'm thankful for a patient, grace giving husband. And I'm thankful to serve a God who sets that example for us. A God who not only shows us patience and grace day in and day out, but also helps us to show it to one another. One opportunity down, many more to go, but I think we're starting to get the hang of it.
#624 - For opportunities to receive grace and patience.
"Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a city." - Psalm 16:32
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