Reason #290
We are 11 days apart in age. She beat me into this world by a week and half. Our moms, sisters. And so a bond was forged early on. Linked by blood. A common thread pulsing through our veins. Cousins, friends. Girls who look like sisters. Girls who have a lot more in common than DNA.
We had dinner tonight. Rosa's, a fail-proof choice. We showed up in our comfy clothes. Sweat pants, sweatshirts, tennis shoes. I hardly wore any make-up today. My hair, pulled back in a messy pony tail due to my lack of motivation this morning. She had just finished playing a volleyball game. One of the few things we don't have in common. We ordered our chicken salads and sat down to eat. Four weeks since our last dinner date, and we were due another one. And so we began to update one another on our lives current happenings. Both of our lives have changed quite a bit over the past year. She got married 14 months ago. My world crumbled shortly thereafter. And so life pulled us in different directions. Because up until that point, we were involved in a lot of the same things, doing a lot of the same things, seeing one another often. Things do change, but not everything changes.
She was the first "friend" who knew. And maybe that doesn't count because she's family, however, it does. Because not everyone is friends with their family. So she was the first one, next to my parents, that I told. She called me after a football game last fall. We had season tickets together and I didn't make the game. She came over and I told her. I don't think she knew what to do, what to say. She didn't have to say anything. I just needed her to know. And I knew it was safe to tell her because I knew she would love me. I knew she would have my back. I knew she would support me and encourage me. She wouldn't judge, she wouldn't shrug it off, she wouldn't pull away, no, I knew she'd care and that she'd be there for me in an instant. You have these moments in life that you really, really hate. Moments that you'd like to skip over. And sometimes, it's those very moments that speak loudest. It's those excrutiating moments that are the most telling. Because in those moments, in those dark, difficult, shamefully embarrassing moments, you see who people really are. You see their value. You see their loyalty. You see their care for you and it's rare to have a person be a part of your whole entire life, see your worst moments, and still care deeply for you without abandon. We should all be so lucky to have at least one of those in our lives.
One night, one of the nights after a counseling session, she checked on me. It wasn't a good night, but I remember it well. In fact, I even remember what I wore. She had been praying for me. Desperately pleading and asking the Lord to intervene, to rescue. Well, I came home and my mom was here, as was the usual after every counseling session. But Lauren came over, Chad, too. And I sat on my couch and I cried. I bawled my eyes out and, for lack of a better word, it just sucked. There's no nice, polite way to say it. And I remember that she sat down next to me, wrapped her arms around me, and she cried with me. She didn't have to say a word. In fact, if she did, I don't remember what she said. But she did exactly what needed to be done in that moment. Because I didn't need to hear any words, I didn't need any advice or any bits of scripture quoted to me then and there. No, I needed to cry and I needed someone to cry with. And that, right there, is how you know you have a jewel of a friend in your possession. When someone can look at you, a crying, slobbery mess, and can wrap their arms around you and mix their tears with yours, well, it doesn't get much sweeter than that. And that's one of those moments. A moment when you really see how fortunate you are.
We didn't cry tonight. No tears were shed. And sure, things have changed, but here's what hasn't changed. She hasn't changed. She's still my cousin and one of my dearest and closest friends. And I love her to absolute pieces. That hasn't changed either. Our lives have changed and the change has led us in different directions. But we're forever bound. Bound by DNA, by a really awesome family, by that common blood pulsing through our veins. But even if we didn't have that going for us, we'd still be bound. Bound because of moments like that. And I praise God that He gave me family members who could double as friends, for that in itself is a rare find...a precious jewel!
#290 - Because of cousins who aren't just family but are actually friends!
"... the family of the godly stands firm." - Proverbs 12:7
We had dinner tonight. Rosa's, a fail-proof choice. We showed up in our comfy clothes. Sweat pants, sweatshirts, tennis shoes. I hardly wore any make-up today. My hair, pulled back in a messy pony tail due to my lack of motivation this morning. She had just finished playing a volleyball game. One of the few things we don't have in common. We ordered our chicken salads and sat down to eat. Four weeks since our last dinner date, and we were due another one. And so we began to update one another on our lives current happenings. Both of our lives have changed quite a bit over the past year. She got married 14 months ago. My world crumbled shortly thereafter. And so life pulled us in different directions. Because up until that point, we were involved in a lot of the same things, doing a lot of the same things, seeing one another often. Things do change, but not everything changes.
She was the first "friend" who knew. And maybe that doesn't count because she's family, however, it does. Because not everyone is friends with their family. So she was the first one, next to my parents, that I told. She called me after a football game last fall. We had season tickets together and I didn't make the game. She came over and I told her. I don't think she knew what to do, what to say. She didn't have to say anything. I just needed her to know. And I knew it was safe to tell her because I knew she would love me. I knew she would have my back. I knew she would support me and encourage me. She wouldn't judge, she wouldn't shrug it off, she wouldn't pull away, no, I knew she'd care and that she'd be there for me in an instant. You have these moments in life that you really, really hate. Moments that you'd like to skip over. And sometimes, it's those very moments that speak loudest. It's those excrutiating moments that are the most telling. Because in those moments, in those dark, difficult, shamefully embarrassing moments, you see who people really are. You see their value. You see their loyalty. You see their care for you and it's rare to have a person be a part of your whole entire life, see your worst moments, and still care deeply for you without abandon. We should all be so lucky to have at least one of those in our lives.
One night, one of the nights after a counseling session, she checked on me. It wasn't a good night, but I remember it well. In fact, I even remember what I wore. She had been praying for me. Desperately pleading and asking the Lord to intervene, to rescue. Well, I came home and my mom was here, as was the usual after every counseling session. But Lauren came over, Chad, too. And I sat on my couch and I cried. I bawled my eyes out and, for lack of a better word, it just sucked. There's no nice, polite way to say it. And I remember that she sat down next to me, wrapped her arms around me, and she cried with me. She didn't have to say a word. In fact, if she did, I don't remember what she said. But she did exactly what needed to be done in that moment. Because I didn't need to hear any words, I didn't need any advice or any bits of scripture quoted to me then and there. No, I needed to cry and I needed someone to cry with. And that, right there, is how you know you have a jewel of a friend in your possession. When someone can look at you, a crying, slobbery mess, and can wrap their arms around you and mix their tears with yours, well, it doesn't get much sweeter than that. And that's one of those moments. A moment when you really see how fortunate you are.
We didn't cry tonight. No tears were shed. And sure, things have changed, but here's what hasn't changed. She hasn't changed. She's still my cousin and one of my dearest and closest friends. And I love her to absolute pieces. That hasn't changed either. Our lives have changed and the change has led us in different directions. But we're forever bound. Bound by DNA, by a really awesome family, by that common blood pulsing through our veins. But even if we didn't have that going for us, we'd still be bound. Bound because of moments like that. And I praise God that He gave me family members who could double as friends, for that in itself is a rare find...a precious jewel!
#290 - Because of cousins who aren't just family but are actually friends!
"... the family of the godly stands firm." - Proverbs 12:7
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