Reason #12

My dogs are barking. For those of you not from West Texas, that's just another way of saying my feet are tired. My dogs are actually howling. I wore heels today, a new trend I'm trying, and they rubbed a few holes in my toes. Isn't it strange the lengths we women will go to to look cute? I strategically wore those shoes today because I knew I wouldn't be moving around much. As my shoes rubbed layers off the top of my toes today, I kept thinking, is it worth it? Do my legs even look good in these shoes? Are Stacy and Clinton correct when they say heels make your legs look longer? Beauty is pain. On the flip side, I did get a hair cut today and that always makes me feel like a new woman. Thankfully, that's an enjoyable experience.

Like most of the female population, I have never been fully satisfied with the way I look.  I could easily name off 10 things I'd like to change about myself in 5 seconds flat. My insecurities have died down as I've gotten older (thank goodness) but now and again things will happen that cause me to be concerned with my appearance. I had quite a long stint in life of being an "ugly duckling." My parents, being the great parents that they are, were always quick to tell me I was beautiful. Of course, I'm composed of their genes so they have to say that, right? Anyhow, my late elementary years through junior high were pretty rough. There aren't many photos to document this time in my life and the ones that do exist have been tucked away in a secret place. Thanks to contacts, braces, Accutane, make-up and a good hair cut, things started to turn around when I entered high school. During high school, I made an effort to look my best at all times. There was no way anyone not related to me was going to see me without make up. In fact, I even "got ready" to go to the gym. I know, pathetic. In college, I quickly realized that you weren't supposed to put effort into your appearance, so I cut down my beauty routine for class... a little. I noticed that even though most of the girls rolled out of bed, they still looked fabulous with their fresh faces and pretty pony tails. I couldn't quite pull the look off.

Sometimes, I really feel sorry for us girls. We are plagued with pictures of airbrushed beauties that we unfortunately compare ourselves to. I look through magazines and I think I'll never be "(fill in the blank) enough." I'll never look like that. Even though I fully know those girls have been graphically enhanced, it doesn't stop me from comparing myself to them. I've spent much time plucking, whitening, tanning, straightening, calorie counting, painting, concealing, creaming, highlighting and tucking only to realize that, in the eyes of the world, I still have a LONG way to go. Even as I sit here writing this blog, without a stitch of make up on, wearing my glasses and retainers, I can feel the bags under my eyes turning into checked luggage. I realize what kind of image I have just painted of myself, so, for my sake, try not to picture me right now.

When we look at ourselves by the worlds standards, it's quick to see that we don't stand a chance. We'll never be "good" enough. Lately, I've struggled with feeling as if I'm not "______ enough," so I've been praying that God would show me how He sees me. Interestingly enough, Psalm 45:11 tells me that "the King is enthralled by [my] beauty." Talk about a night and day comparison. Enthralled is a powerful word. It could say "the King thinks you have a good personality and you're a nice girl," but He doesn't think that. He is enthralled! How different we look when we see ourselves through God's truth versus the world's deception.

I often times get nervous when people see me in my natural state. I feel very vulnerable and am so concerned about what they are thinking and if my imperfections are as obvious to them as they are to me. On more than one occasion, I have had someone meet me without make up and then, shortly after, see me with make-up only to introduce themselves again...oy! 1 Peter 3: 3-4 reminds us that our beauty should really come from our inner selves, not from our outward appearance. I've been surrounded by so many beautiful Godly women, and I see the truth in this verse. This kind of beauty is not man-made, nor can it be bought or airbrushed. The best thing about this beauty is that it's unfading. It doesn't wash off at the end of the day or go out of style in a few years.

So, I'll wake up tomorrow and I'll spend a good 30-45 minutes getting ready. I'll go to work with my make-up on and my hair in place, however I will be opting for flats rather than heels. As I get ready in the morning, I'm going to remind myself that, "I am fearfully and wonderfully made." (Psalm 139:14)

#12 - Because He sees me for who I really am and is still enthralled.

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." -Proverbs 31:30

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