Reason #175
I began working on a new bible study session today. I came across a verse that caused me to stop and do a little research, and before I knew it I was researching the whole lineage of Jesus. I'm not really sure how I got there, but I was extremely excited about the revelations I was discovering. I began drawing family trees and trying to make connections. I came across the story of Leah and Rachel, which has been stuck in my head ever since.
Jacob, the grandson of Abraham, finds himself at his uncle Laban's house after a good, old-fashioned sibiling rivalry rumble. Upon arrival he just happens to notice Laban's daughters, Leah and Rachel (boys haven't changed much over 2000 thousand years have they?).
"Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful. Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, “I’ll work for you seven years in return for your younger daughter Rachel.” (Genesis 29:16-18)
Leah, poor Leah. Leah with the beautiful sister. Leah, the less desireable one. Leah, the defective one. Leah, always being compared to Rachel. Rachel, the beautiful one. The one everybody wants. The one who can always have whatever she wants. And although I'm sure sisters are a big blessing, some days I'm grateful I don't have one.
So the story goes like this. Jacob works for 7 years to marry Rachel. However, Laban actually gives him Leah's hand in marriage. Jacob freaks out, gives Leah one week of his time because he has to, and then agrees to work 7 more years so he can have Rachel. Dumped. Cast to the side. Rejected.
And I began to wonder about Leah. I began to think about her situation, sympathize for her, feel for her. Leah didn't really stand a chance from the start. I'm sure she noticed Jacob stealing glances at her sister, the beautiful one. I'm sure she was fully aware of the arrangement that had been made. And I wonder if she thought, "Will anyone ever look at me that way? Will anyone ever work that hard to win my heart? Why her, why not me? Will I ever have a chance?"
And then the wedding day came and I wonder if she wanted to be Jacob's bride. I wonder if she began to feel little butterflies and twinges of excitement as she thought, "Finally! Someone wants me to be their other half." But then the veil was pulled back and there were those stinging words again. "This isn't her. This isn't the one I wanted. This isn't the beautiful bride I have been working so hard for. What must I do to get the other one, the pretty one?" And I have to believe that those butterflies quickly morphed into stomach ulcers and humiliation as the reality of rejection set in. Leah, undesirable, unwanted. Leah, never able to measure up. Leah, never going to be Rachel. Leah, still unloved.
I feel like Leah. And if I could see her, if I could talk to her, I would say, "Sister, I totally understand how you feel and it's not fun. Let's go eat some chocolate cake and follow it up with retail therapy." Because I, too, have pretty weak eyes but when I look in the mirror I can still see it. Under the hairspray, make-up and layers, I notice it. I only hope no one else will see it, and I really hope no one else will compare me because I know I'll fall short. But even if they don't compare me, I still do. And I find myself, just like Leah, sitting on the sidelines watching the Rachel's take over. Watching things work out perfectly well for them and all the time wondering why it didn't for me. Why have I been cast to the side, unloved, rejected, unwanted, seen as undesireable? Why is it that I still fell short even though I tried to do everything right?
Well, it's easy for the why's to add up, and the unfortunate truth is that rarely are they answered. And so you can sit on the curb throwing rocks and questioning every single thing about you as a person, or you can stop and trust that God can turn those why's into wow's!
"But because Leah was unloved, the Lord let her have a child...she became pregnant and had a son. She named him Judah, for she said, "Now I will praise the Lord!" (Genesis 29:31&35)
Judah, the tribe from which Jesus Christ was born. Leah got to be in the blood line of the Messiah! Leah, the great-great-great-great (times a lot) grandmother of the Savior of the world. And I'm sure as she held baby Judah, she had no clue of what she was holding in her arms. In fact, I don't know that Leah ever knew that she was getting to be a part of Jesus' lineage, of God's perfect plan. I bet Leah had no idea that she played an intregal and necessary role in the redepmtion of mankind. If only Leah could have known that she, in fact, was chosen for so much more than she knew at the time. Leah was deeply loved by a God who was laying the groundwork for the birth of His only Son, the Son who would take away the sins of the world. Leah, a woman who would be changing lives for the rest of history. Leah, desireable to the God who created her, weak eyes and all.
And I have chills tonight as I think about this woman, Leah. Because thousands of years ago, Leah had no clue that on July 6, 2012 a 24-year-old girl, feeling insecure in every form of the word, feeling unlovely, undesireable, and unwanted, would read Leah's story and have hope. Hope that she, too, would be used for a greater plan. Hope, that she, too, would get to play a necessary role in the making of something beautiful and incredible. Hope, that her life and legacy would morph into so much more than she ever knew. Because Leah and I serve the same God, and I figure if He can turn her why's into wow's and use her to be an intregal part of His plan to change lives, He can do the same for me, too.
#175 - Because He turns our why's into wow's!
“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.” - 1 Corinthians 2:9
Jacob, the grandson of Abraham, finds himself at his uncle Laban's house after a good, old-fashioned sibiling rivalry rumble. Upon arrival he just happens to notice Laban's daughters, Leah and Rachel (boys haven't changed much over 2000 thousand years have they?).
"Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful. Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, “I’ll work for you seven years in return for your younger daughter Rachel.” (Genesis 29:16-18)
Leah, poor Leah. Leah with the beautiful sister. Leah, the less desireable one. Leah, the defective one. Leah, always being compared to Rachel. Rachel, the beautiful one. The one everybody wants. The one who can always have whatever she wants. And although I'm sure sisters are a big blessing, some days I'm grateful I don't have one.
So the story goes like this. Jacob works for 7 years to marry Rachel. However, Laban actually gives him Leah's hand in marriage. Jacob freaks out, gives Leah one week of his time because he has to, and then agrees to work 7 more years so he can have Rachel. Dumped. Cast to the side. Rejected.
And I began to wonder about Leah. I began to think about her situation, sympathize for her, feel for her. Leah didn't really stand a chance from the start. I'm sure she noticed Jacob stealing glances at her sister, the beautiful one. I'm sure she was fully aware of the arrangement that had been made. And I wonder if she thought, "Will anyone ever look at me that way? Will anyone ever work that hard to win my heart? Why her, why not me? Will I ever have a chance?"
And then the wedding day came and I wonder if she wanted to be Jacob's bride. I wonder if she began to feel little butterflies and twinges of excitement as she thought, "Finally! Someone wants me to be their other half." But then the veil was pulled back and there were those stinging words again. "This isn't her. This isn't the one I wanted. This isn't the beautiful bride I have been working so hard for. What must I do to get the other one, the pretty one?" And I have to believe that those butterflies quickly morphed into stomach ulcers and humiliation as the reality of rejection set in. Leah, undesirable, unwanted. Leah, never able to measure up. Leah, never going to be Rachel. Leah, still unloved.
I feel like Leah. And if I could see her, if I could talk to her, I would say, "Sister, I totally understand how you feel and it's not fun. Let's go eat some chocolate cake and follow it up with retail therapy." Because I, too, have pretty weak eyes but when I look in the mirror I can still see it. Under the hairspray, make-up and layers, I notice it. I only hope no one else will see it, and I really hope no one else will compare me because I know I'll fall short. But even if they don't compare me, I still do. And I find myself, just like Leah, sitting on the sidelines watching the Rachel's take over. Watching things work out perfectly well for them and all the time wondering why it didn't for me. Why have I been cast to the side, unloved, rejected, unwanted, seen as undesireable? Why is it that I still fell short even though I tried to do everything right?
Well, it's easy for the why's to add up, and the unfortunate truth is that rarely are they answered. And so you can sit on the curb throwing rocks and questioning every single thing about you as a person, or you can stop and trust that God can turn those why's into wow's!
"But because Leah was unloved, the Lord let her have a child...she became pregnant and had a son. She named him Judah, for she said, "Now I will praise the Lord!" (Genesis 29:31&35)
Judah, the tribe from which Jesus Christ was born. Leah got to be in the blood line of the Messiah! Leah, the great-great-great-great (times a lot) grandmother of the Savior of the world. And I'm sure as she held baby Judah, she had no clue of what she was holding in her arms. In fact, I don't know that Leah ever knew that she was getting to be a part of Jesus' lineage, of God's perfect plan. I bet Leah had no idea that she played an intregal and necessary role in the redepmtion of mankind. If only Leah could have known that she, in fact, was chosen for so much more than she knew at the time. Leah was deeply loved by a God who was laying the groundwork for the birth of His only Son, the Son who would take away the sins of the world. Leah, a woman who would be changing lives for the rest of history. Leah, desireable to the God who created her, weak eyes and all.
And I have chills tonight as I think about this woman, Leah. Because thousands of years ago, Leah had no clue that on July 6, 2012 a 24-year-old girl, feeling insecure in every form of the word, feeling unlovely, undesireable, and unwanted, would read Leah's story and have hope. Hope that she, too, would be used for a greater plan. Hope, that she, too, would get to play a necessary role in the making of something beautiful and incredible. Hope, that her life and legacy would morph into so much more than she ever knew. Because Leah and I serve the same God, and I figure if He can turn her why's into wow's and use her to be an intregal part of His plan to change lives, He can do the same for me, too.
#175 - Because He turns our why's into wow's!
“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.” - 1 Corinthians 2:9
I too remember that rejection, cast aside like a sack of garbage to a curb BUT The wow's are wonderful when they come. And thank you Lord -Your ways are higher than our ways. Terri B
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